Some moments just aren’t teachable.

When a child is melting down, their brain isn’t ready to reflect, reason, or remember those calming strategies like taking deep breaths.

What they need in the moment isn’t a lesson—it’s a lifeline.
 
Waiting to teach so children have a chance to recover from strong feelings will transform our relationships with children. What they need when they are distressed is connection, not isolation. Understanding, not judgment. Acceptance, not idealization. We have to help the child in front of us, not the child we wish we had.

In those unteachable moments, let us simply be the adult who puts the human before the lesson.
 
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